Thoughts on a Friday

Before me is my bedroom window, just above my desk. It's about eight o'clock and the sun is setting, although the sky is so pale with mist that you can't quite tell.

I have my window open and outside I hear small birds, cars passing by on the street below, leftover droplets of a day drenched with rain; the air is sparkling with tiny beads of water and the grass is far more luscious than you'd think.

I love this time of year. Each time I breathe in the spring air I swear I am healed. I stepped out into my backyard about an hour ago, the sky still falling, puddles left and right and the ground a miniature marshland. I stood there for a few moments, absolutely enjoying the rain.

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These days I feel eager: so often I'm cooped up in my room working on projects tirelessly, moving forward, swirling to and from work, designing my days; all things I do I do with intention, mostly, and truly I do. I have a plan, or an outline, perhaps, for how I'd like things to unfold, but yet I am also just taking small steps each morning that I wake and mostly I'm just in a state of allowing what's to be and what has already been.

Allowing is a most beautiful state to be in. There is nothing more freeing than allowing: to me this is open arms, open eyes, most definitely an open heart, but more than anything it is accepting at the very same time. Being open to challenges, open to opportunities, accepting of hardships, accepting of accomplishments. The path of least resistance.

At the same time though, might I add, there is an element that is just as importance as sitting back and allowing, and that's doing, too. Getting up and making it happen. Whatever it is. That's what I've been so eager about lately, continuing to create for myself what it is that I feel I'm lacking around me. Never do we need to feel stuck or trapped in one way of living or doing or being, because we are the designers of our world, and this is as thrilling as can be. Even more thrilling is the idea of allowing the outcomes of things, a no-expectation way of living, you know?

Just some thoughts on a Friday.

Sunday Scribblings: Drought

A long time ago I was directed to a blog, Sunday Scribblings, that provides writing-prompts. A word to source some inspiration of something to write about. I haven't done it since last year, and seeing as today is Sunday, I thought it be a good day to reunite with it. Today's word is drought.

Naturally I'd like to write a poem, but instead I'm feeling compelled to just write about my thoughts on that word. Drought. It can go many different ways, and my mind's eye is focusing in on metaphors and analogies that surround the concept of going through a period of time in our lives when there is little sustenance; a lack of substance. Those times when we find ourselves amidst a life of "drought". Wishing and waiting for "rain", symbolically representing peace, balance, freedom or an open door; satiety or repletion, or whatever the idea of precipitation means to you, to feed our thirsty hearts.

In this case, I am referring to rain as a representation of redemption, so to speak. Something to long for when we're all dried up. Wherever we are in our lives, whatever path we are on or stage we are at; whether we feel that need for revitalization just as a thirsty, coiled floret... rainfall will always ensue to replenish our withered bones.

Expression, Fall, Camping & Magic

I'm feeling particularly creative right now and really feel like writing. As I have mentioned here and elsewhere, my life has been the quintessence of change. I got lost a wee bit (more than once), but particularly in the process of opening my website - deciding what goes where, what posts should be shared at what location, losing touch with what feels right and authentic for me. This blog is very dear to my heart. I never thought it would become as such, but it has become quite meaningful. Sentimental. Special. Free Spirit Journal represents all of me; a safe vessel where I have allowed myself to free-flow creatively.

Anyways, what I am trying to say is that along my adventure into the world of website-owning, I didn't know what to do with this blog. Would I just neglect it? How would I utilize it? How should I continue to share? It was making me feel uneasy. All I know is that ultimately, continuing with this blog the way I always have is exactly what I want to do and makes me feel nice.

I wanted to share three things today. The fall, camping, and magic.

These days now I can really sense that autumn-like air. That September-esque vibe. And quite frankly, I like it. The fall is my very favourite season and for good reason. Cool, windy, brisk air. Red, orange, yellow leaves. Jackets. Boots. Scarves. Hats. Walks. Sidewalks. There's just simply a very characteristic feel about that time of year. Words can't quite describe. Feeling is the language of the Universe, after all ;-) I'm just really looking forward to it.

I got back yesterday from a weekend of camping up north in Huntsville, Ontario. I love nature, of course I was excited. I couldn't wait to be amongst trees and oxygen. I'm a forest fairy (people call me that anyway), I really relish in and resonate with the energies of trees, moss and earth. I'm also a Capricorn, an Earth element. A mountain goat. I like groundedness (but don't be fooled - I am a fairy after all!)

The weekend turned out to be 100% rain. I like to think of myself as a pretty optimistic person; before we left when the weatherman was calling for rain all weekend I was still feeling pretty nonchalant and even excited about prancing around in misty forest air. Ultimately I knew a lesson would be learned by the end of it, if anything.

No. Couldn't fool myself. It was awful. It wasn't even innocent, harmless rain that came and went. It was just perpetual showers with intermittent down-pours and thunder. Everything was wet, damp, moist, sticky. By the end of it we just laughed at how ridiculous the situation became. It only got worse, but more comical. However, I was still able to find a few moments of awe at the beauty of dewy, misty trees like the second picture shown. I wasn't going a whole 3 hours north without closing my eyes and breathing in the beauty of everything. It was so green!

I lastly just wanted to share a little tidbit of my day today. I went to one of my favourite metaphysical shops today. Every time I'm in there I'm always so overwhelmed. Too interested in everything I see so it's hard to focus on one thing at a time. Trinkets are everywhere, books, candles, incense, crystals, gemstones. I got a little "Magic" star that I'm going to keep in my wallet. It very particularly stood out for me because "magic" seems to me my word of choice for most things I describe. I just say it a lot for some reason. It represents everything in life - everything is just... magic. :)

Meg

plans & anticipation

thunderstorm Sunday afternoon

Don't you just love thunderstorms? There is something enchanting about them. That distinct scent of rain, billowing of black clouds, cessation of wind before the downpour ensues.

I have been feeling overwhelmingly creative these days. My mind has been submerged in anticipation for what is quickly approaching in my life. In just a couple of weeks I will begin my newest life chapter; it feels as though I am bursting at the seams with excitement for the plethora of plans that I have. I will begin the process of collaborating my blogs, including free spirit journal, into one website where I will finally be able to have one space to share, express, connect and inspire through each of my many passions - spirituality, nutrition, life - as a Holistic Nutritionist.

My life for nearly a year now has been saturated in stress with having too much to do and simply not enough time to do it all. But somehow I've always managed to get everything done in the midst of chaos. This has actually been my theme for this month of July - perseverance, diligence and determination. In fact, July has been quite the month of lessons and themes. I've really been coming into my power of letting go and releasing fears pertaining to the ever-so-scary (but not really) opinions of others. Oh the liberation!

I am really looking forward to finding my balance again; re-connecting with my neglected creativity, harnessing my higher self and soaking in the silence of sunrises and meditation. Oh the thought of all that I desire to do makes me feel such peace!

Here is a quote I found yesterday from my newest blog muse over at the sacred life of rain:

Today I am exactly where I need to be in my one wild and precious life.

And we always are.

Walks and Talks

As always

walks in the rain are mandatory for the peace it brings,

except this time damp colourful leaves are everywhere.

I wish there was a way for me to meticulously describe my bike ride atop a cliff yesterday,

but there is not!

A couple weeks ago on my daily 40 minute drive to school I accidentally came across the best radio station that ever came to be (in Toronto it's 89.5fm, but it's worldwide). They host a one hour radio series from 9-10am that has a different episode every day ranging from all sorts of incredible topics from corporate America, globalization, today's environmental, food and health crises to science and spirituality and solutions to the absurdly and ridiculously frustrating distorted world we currently live in due to the powers that be. The radio series is called Bioneers (biological pioneers!) All of this is actually specifically what has been bothering me a lot lately. A lot.

At the introduction to the episodes there is a clip of a woman doing a lecture saying "...it's all connected, it's all intelligence, it's all relatives" while geese are sounding in the background and everytime it plays this clip I cry. Every morning I am literally crying on my way to school. It certainly puts a bit of a damper on my morning but I can't not listen - there is such an enormous amount of invaluable information to be heard and it is very significant for everybody to listen. Agh! Everything is just so messed up and everything is connected and I hate this apparent universal ignorance that has washed over humanity but I know people can awaken to it all and I hope so badly that things will change and all of the corporations that are in power over everything (like Monsanto, for one small example) will be shut down. Ultimately, I wish for that. I feel as though this is what a big part or meaning of my life is all about - changing the current world we inhabit, someway, somehow. I know it begins with the collective minds. Perspectives and attitudes must be adjusted into the direction of supporting and connecting with nature and ourselves, first. I feel like I know what so many of the answers are and everything that I would do if I could do it would make so much sense but the scope of the world is so large and I feel so small.

Anyways, do check out the radio series which I believe you can find and listen to on their website, or perhaps the conference itself from which it originates. www.bioneers.org.

Pique

Oh, life.
What is it?
Yesterday the wind piqued my curiosity
and today the rain is heavy and the sounds wash through me
while I sit beside my window.
The fallen droplets are crystal clear and they represent
sustenance
cleanse
release
grow
life.

Here is a mind-blowing quote of inspiration:

You have more raw brain power and creative
ability than you have ever used in your lifetime.
Your brain has over 100 billion cells,
each of which is connected to as many as 20 thousand other cells
by a complex network of ganglia and dendrites.
This means that the possible combinations and
permutations of cells in your brain is greater than
the number of molecules in the known universe.
Your ability to develop ideas, learn new information,
grasp simple and complex theories
is infinite and
unlimited.

Rain Dance

It is absolutely pouring outside. My brother and I ran outside immediately and started running around. I think the last time I ever danced in the rain and thoroughly allowed myself to soak in it was like six years ago. Damn it feels good! Our street was like a river and the main street just off our street was literally like foot-deep rapids. Probably this is serious and some flooding occurred. But it was fun nonetheless.

It has been quite rainy these days but I revel in it. It is especially enchanting when you wake up to the sound of heavy rain and it is particularly cleansing to even just sit by a window and watch the raindrops hit the trees and form a magical mistiness that truly makes everything look like a dream.

mystical

~Underneath a magical umbrella tree in my front yard

I would describe today as mystical because it is rainy and cloudy and cool. These are my favourite days. I simply love the dampness and the drops and the sensing that thirsty things are being satiated. Rainy days seem quieter and slower and fuller and I like it. I love being rained on it feels like nothing else and it bestows something though I don't know what it is.

Today's quote, as recited by my mother from a newspaper:
We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.