Breathe

~Trees outside my bedroom window

I'm longing for the Spring. I want to step outside in the cool breeze and feel the universe around me, the interconnectedness run through every cell in my body. I want warm days with sunshine and long, slow, easy walks. I want the comfort of a light sweater, no icicle-hands and frozen faces. I want eyes gently shut and arms reaching out and up to the sky. A long skirt to flow in the wind atop the cliff by the lake. Peace and a seat on the grass, breathing deeply. I want tears of pure happiness and quiet flowing through my blood. Nonchalance and smiles at the world. Bare feet on the ground and lying down beside a tree. Meditation in the forest, gazing at a flowing river. No rushing home to get warm, no rushing at all. I want misty raindrops on my skin and some thunder out my window. 

Leisurely. Dreamy.

I've been stressed a bit because of work these days. I don't particularly *like* my job and I really struggle to accept that I need to work there for now. And I work so much that all my time is devoted to a place I dislike and people I can't relate to. I'm lacking in areas of my life that bring me the utmost peace, and below zero temperatures accompanied by brown snow and a lack of vitamin D doesn't help. When I do have free time it's only for the rest of the evening and I'm up early again to do it all over. I really don't like this repetitiveness and I can't wait to be in school so I'm surrounded by my passion rather than the opposite.

Though I have been reading a couple books by Eckhart Tolle and I enjoy it a lot. Lots of reminders to focus on the present, to accept it, and to just be here Now. And this is what I have been trying my best to keep my intention on. I have a few days off, I just need to breathe.